Monday, January 11, 2021

Bubba’s tragic demise

Sadly, Bubba was killed in suspicious circumstances in a terrible fire, suffering severe burns that left him completely unrecognizable. 

In order to identify the body formally, the Los Angeles County medical examiner called in Bubba’s two close friends Jim-Bob and Joe-Bob. 

The medical examiner showed Jim-Bob the body and he responded with a sharp intake of breath and then said, “Oh jeez, he’s burnt to a crisp. Could you roll him over please sir?” 

So the medical examiner rolled the body and Jim-Bob responded immediately saying, “No sir, that ain’t Bubba.” 

“Are you sure?” said the medical examiner. “Yes sir, I’m sure,” Jim-Bob responded, “but you can ask Joe-Bob if you like.” 

So Joe-Bob was brought into the mortuary and shown the body. “Jeez,” said Joe-Bob, “he’s burnt to a crisp. Could you roll him over please sir?” 

Though puzzled to receive this request once again, the medical examiner dutifully obliged and rolled the body. 

Joe-Bob paused momentarily and then said, “No sir, that ain’t Bubba.” 

The medical examiner was mystified by this turn of events. So he asked, “How can you possibly tell that it isn’t Bubba just by rolling him over?” 

“Well sir,” said Joe-Bob, “Bubba had two assholes.” 

“What do you mean, he had two assholes?” exclaimed the medical examiner. 

“Yes sir, everyone knew that around here,” said Joe-Bob. 

“How do you know?” the medical examiner asked. 

To which Joe-Bob responded, “Because every time the three of us walked down Main Street together, you’d hear people say, ‘Here comes Bubba with two assholes’.”

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