Tuesday, March 31, 2020
Just received this from Peter Horwath, Baryon Cover artist, and just had to share it.
Subject: Important Tax Advice/Economic Stimulus
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will likely receive another economic stimulus.
It is indeed a very exciting program, and I’ll explain it by using a Q&A format:
Q: What is an Economic Stimulus?
A: It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
Q: Where will the government get this money?
A: From taxpayers.
Q: Is the government simply giving me back my own money, then?
A: No, only a smidgen of it.
Q: What is the purpose of this payment?
A: The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high definition television set, a new iPad, or a new SUV, thus stimulating the economy.
Q: Isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?
A: Shut up.
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U. S. Economy with your stimulus check. Use it wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart the money will go to China or Sri Lanka.
* if you spend it on gasoline, it money will go to the Arabs.
* if you purchase a computer, it goes to India, Taiwan or China.
* if you purchase fruits and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala.
* if you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea.
* if you purchase useless stuff, it goes to Taiwan.
* if you pay your credit card off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
Instead, keep the money in America by:
(1) Spending it at a yard sale, or
(2) Going to a ballgame, or
(3) Spending it on prostitutes, or
(4) Beer, or
(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.)
CONCLUSION: Go to a ballgame with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day.
No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help.
Sunday, March 29, 2020
I Jest You Not…
Maybe you've already seen this. I know we lived it while in the military.
I remember seeing this back in the 80's but couldn't find it again...until recently.
Murphy's thoughts: Military terms / sayings to reflect on:
Friendly fire - isn't.
Recoil-less rifles - aren't.
Suppressive fires - won't.
You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.
A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.
If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.
Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on
If at first you don't succeed, call in an air strike.
If it isn't broke, don't mess with it.
If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.
Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.
Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.
Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.
The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.
The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions: when they're ready and when you're not.
No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.
There is no such thing as a perfect plan.
Five-second fuses always burn three seconds.
There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.
A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping.
The Ol' Ranger's addendum: Or else they're trying to suck you into a serious ambush!
The important things are always simple; the simple are always hard.
The easy way is always mined.
Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at.
Don't look conspicuous; it draws fire. For this reason, it is not at all uncommon
for aircraft carriers to be known as bomb magnets.
Never draw fire; it irritates everyone around you.
If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone.
When you have secured the area, make sure the enemy knows it too.
Incoming fire has the right of way.
No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection.
No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat.
If the enemy is within range, so are you.
The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
Things which must be shipped together as a set, aren't.
Things that must work together, can't be carried to the field that way.
Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support.
Radar tends to fail at night and in bad weather, and especially during both.)
Anything you do can get you killed, including nothing.
Make it too tough for the enemy to get in, and you won't be able to get out.
Tracers work both ways.
If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will get more than your
fair share of objectives to take.
When both sides are convinced they're about to lose, they're both right.
Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs.
Military Intelligence is a contradiction.
Fortify your front; you'll get your rear shot up.
Weather ain't neutral.
If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed toward you.
Air defense motto: shoot 'em down; sort 'em out on the ground. 'Flies high, it dies;
low and slow, it'll go.
The Cavalry doesn't always come to the rescue.
Napalm is an area support weapon.
Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
B-52s are the ultimate close support weapon.
Sniper's motto: reach out and touch someone.
Killing for peace is like screwing for virginity.
The one item you need is always in short supply.
Interchangeable parts aren't.
It's not the one with your name on it; it's the one addressed "to whom it may
concern "you've got to think about.
When in doubt, empty your magazine.
The side with the simplest uniforms wins.
Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps.
If the Platoon Sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.
Never stand when you can sit, never sit when you can lie down, never stay awake when
you can sleep.
The most dangerous thing in the world is a Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass.
Exceptions prove the rule and destroy the battle plan.
Everything always works in your HQ, everything always fails in the Colonel's HQ.
The enemy never watches until you make a mistake.
One enemy soldier is never enough, but two is entirely too many.
Thank you for taking the time to read this. Should you have a question or comment
about this article, then scroll down to the comment section below to leave your response.
If you want to learn more about the Vietnam War and its Warriors, then subscribe to
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Monday, March 23, 2020
Unbelievable, There is a politician that actually gets it...
Summing it all up was Sen. John Neely Kennedy (R-La.), who took his turn on the Senate floor, shaking his head before declaring: “This country was founded by geniuses but it’s being run by a bunch of idiots.”
“You know what the American people are thinking right now?” Kennedy inquired rhetorically. “They’re thinking that the brain is an amazing organ. It starts working in a mother’s womb and it doesn’t stop working til you get elected to Congress.”
Thursday, March 19, 2020
For immediate release
GDVS Coronavirus (COVID-19) Operations Update
Keeping Georgia’s veterans, their families, and our staff healthy and secure is of the utmost
importance to us.
The GDVS is following recommendations from public health authorities on social distancing to
mitigate any potential spread of the virus at any of our Veterans Field Service Offices,
veterans homes, and memorial cemeteries.
All GDVS Veterans Field Service Offices will suspend in person meetings, effective
immediately. Offices remain open for business, but veterans must call or email their local office for
Veterans who need to submit physical evidence for a claim should call and arrange a time to
drop off paperwork with a field officer.
Veterans in need of assistance with an appeal should email their assigned Appeals Officer
Visitation at our veterans nursing homes in Augusta and Milledgeville is suspended, with
exceptions on a case by case basis for compassionate care. Daily operations will continue with
modifications to ensure the safety and health of all residents. Our staff is closely monitoring the
situation and continues to monitor for updates from federal and state authorities.
Both veterans memorial cemeteries in Glennville and Milledgeville have temporarily suspended
committal services. Burial operations and interments will continue and families are permitted
to visit grave sites after daily burials have been completed. Families may schedule committal
services to be held in the future.
Additional changes to operations may be made as this public health crisis continues to evolve.
We will continue to monitor the situation and update as necessary.
For accurate and reliable information about COVID-19,
visit https://dph.georgia.gov/novelcoronavirus or https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-
For more information on the contents of this news release, please contact the GDVS Public
Information Division at email@example.com.
Monday, March 9, 2020
We’re pleased to tell you before anyone else that Brian Freeman over at LetterPress Publications has arranged with François Vaillancourt to collect all of his artwork from the LPP special edition of REVIVAL by Stephen King into a beautiful oversized artwork portfolio!
The REVIVAL Deluxe Limited Edition Artwork Portfolio will feature twenty pieces of artwork, including the alternative version of the car accident (which only appeared in the Lettered Edition), the frontispieces for both editions, and a brand new painting for the signature page. The art will be printed on 11 inch by 14 inch sheets of a fine 100# Linen cover stock, which is archival quality and acid free.
Each set of prints will be housed in a deluxe hand-made portfolio that is covered with the same material as the Limited Edition’s slipcase, making this the perfect companion to your book. There will be two colors of hot foil color stamping on the cover. The interior of the portfolio will be lined with an elegant material that combines the luxury of suede and the richness of velvet.
If you’d like to support Brian directly and reserve this Deluxe Artwork Portfolio without prepayment required, you can visit the product page on his company’s website for details:
*** OR you can read more and place your order through our website while our supplies last:
(If the page says Out of Print, that means all of our available copies have sold, unfortunately.)
Thank you, as always, for your continuing support!
Cemetery Dance Publications
132-B Industry Lane, Unit #7
Forest Hill, MD 21050
Thursday, March 5, 2020
Lettered HAUNTED FOREST TOUR going into production!
I’m pleased to announce that the lettered edition of THE HAUNTED FOREST TOUR by James A. Moore and Jeff Strand, illustrated by Glenn Chadbourne, is going into production! Like our other lettered books, it will be hand sewn and enclosed in a handmade traycase. Features include:
Hand-crumpled, hand-dyed paper made in Nepal that has a dimensional forest-like terrain.
Premium Tiziano endpapers.
Quarter bound in goatskin leather.
Signed by Moore and Strand.
Each book features a unique full-page original illustration by Chadbourne.
Housed in a cloth covered, ultra-suede lined clamshell traycase.
Only 15 lettered copies.
The price is $500; half upon reservation and half at time of shipping (the latter will be a few months from now; postage tacked onto second payment). Please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org by end of day Friday March 6 if you would like a copy. I will attempt to reach out to folks who have previously expressed interest and own previous Halloween Series titles as they’ll get first dibs. However, now that price and design details have been finalized, I wanted to send a fresh notice as there is a decent chance that copies will be available to anyone.
Cover art is from the original 2007 release. Copyright 2007 b Glen Chadbourne and Earthling Publications.