Hearing Aides Optional...

Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, lived in a house together. One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, 'Was I getting in or out of the bath?'

The 94-year-old yells back, 'I don't know. I'll come up and see.' She starts up the stairs and pauses 'Was I going up the stairs or down?'

The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters, she shakes her head and says, 'I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood...'

She then yells, 'I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door.'

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Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day.
One remarked to the other, 'Windy, isn't it?'

'No,' the second man replied, 'it's Thursday.'

And the third man chimed in, 'So am I. Let's have a beer.'

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A little old lady was going up and down the halls in a nursing home.

As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and say 'Supersex’.

'She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair and flipping her gown at him, she said, 'Supersex’.

'He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, 'I'll take the soup.'

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Two elderly gentlemen had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, 'Now don't get mad at me .... I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of your name!'

I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is.'

His friend stared at him for at least three minutes -- he just stared and stared at him. Finally he said, 'How soon do you need to know?'