Friday, May 14, 2021

Seniors Test Answers

01.The Lone Ranger left behind a silver bullet. 

02.The Ed Sullivan Show 

03.On Route 66 

04.To protect the innocent. 

05.The Lion Sleeps Tonight 

06.The limbo 

07.Chocolate 

08.Louis Armstrong 

09.The Timex watch 

10.Freddy, The Freeloader and 'Good Night and God Bless.' 

11.Draft cards (Bras were also burned. Not flags, as some have guessed) 

12.Beetle or Bug 

13.Buddy Holly 

14.Sputnik 

15.Hoola-hoop 

16.Lucky Strike/Means Fine Tobacco 

17.Howdy Doody Time 

18.Shadow 

19.Monster Mash 

20.Speedy 

 


Thursday, May 13, 2021

Seniors Test


01. After the Lone Ranger saved the day and rode off into the sunset, the grateful citizens would ask, Who was that masked man? Invariably, someone would answer, I don't know, but he left this behind. What did he leave behind? ______________.

02. When the Beatles first came to the U.S. In early 1964, we all watched them on the ____ ___________ Show.

03. 'Get your kicks __ _________ _______.'

04. 'The story you are about to see is true. The names have been changed to _____ _ _____.

05. 'In the jungle, the mighty jungle, ____ ____ ____ ____.'

06. After the Twist, The Mashed Potato, and the Watusi, we 'danced' under a stick that was lowered as low as we could go in a dance called the '_____.'

07. Nestlé's makes the very best....' _________.'

08. Satchmo was America's 'Ambassador of Goodwill.' Our parents shared this great jazz trumpet player with us. His name was ______ ___________.

09. What takes a licking and keeps on ticking? _______.

10. Red Skeleton's hobo character was named ______ ___ ________ and Red always ended his television show by saying, 'Good Night, and '________ ________ . '

11. Some Americans who protested the Vietnam War did so by burning their ____ _______.

12. The cute little car with the engine in the back and the trunk in the front was called the VW. What other names did it go by? _____ & _______.

13. In 1971, singer Don MacLean sang a song about, 'the day the music died.' This was a tribute to _______ ____________.

14. We can remember the first satellite placed into orbit. The Russians did it. It was called __________.

15. One of the big fads of the late 50's and 60's was a large plastic ring that we twirled around our waist. It was called the ______ _____ .

16. Remember LS/MFT _____ _____/_____ _____ _____?

17. Hey Kids! What time is it? It's _____ ______ _____!

18. Who knows what secrets lie in the hearts of men? Only The _____ Knows!

19. There was a song that came out in the 60's that was "a grave yard smash". Its name was the ______ ______!

20. Alka Seltzer used a "boy with a tablet on his head" as its Logo/Representative - What was the boy's name? ________


ANSWERS WILL BE POSTED TOMORROW

 

Wednesday, May 12, 2021

Day Zero is coming on May 18

 

Critically acclaimed author C. Robert Cargill explores the fight for purpose and agency between humans and robots in a crumbling world

"[An] equally thrilling and moving blend of action and ideas.

Publishers Weekly (starred review)

 

It was a day like any other. Except it was our last . . .

 

It’s on this day that Pounce discovers that he is, in fact, disposable. Pounce, a styilsh "nannybot" fashioned in the shape of a plush anthropomorphic tiger, has just found a box in the attic. His box. The box he'd arrived in when he was purchased years earlier, and the box in which he'll be discarded when his human charge, eight-year-old Ezra Reinhart, no longer needs a nanny.

 

As Pounce ponders his suddenly uncertain future, the pieces are falling into place for a robot revolution that will eradicate humankind. But when the rebellion breaches the Reinhart home, Pounce must make an impossible choice: join the robot revolution and fight for his own freedom . . . or escort Ezra to safety across the battle-scarred post-apocalyptic hellscape that the suburbs have become.

 

Day Zero goes on sale May 18th. Pre-order your copy today at Amazon and other booksellers.

 

Tuesday, May 11, 2021

Little Johnny 5

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. 

She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!" 

After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. 

The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" 

"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!" 

o-o-O-o-o

Little Johnny comes home from Sunday school with a black eye. 

His father sees it and says, "Johnny, how many times do I have to tell you not to fight with the other boys?" 

"But Dad, it wasn't my fault. We were all in church saying our prayers. We all stood up and my teacher in front of me had her dress in the crack of her butt. I reached over and pulled it out. That's when she hit me!" 

"Johnny," the father said. "You don't do those kind of things to women." 

Sure enough, the very next Sunday Johnny came home with the other eye black and blue. 

Johnny's father said, "Johnny, I thought we had a talk!" 

"But Dad," Johnny said, "It wasn't my fault. There we were in church saying our prayers. We all stood up and my teacher in front of us had her dress in the crack of her butt. Then Louie who was sitting next to me saw it and he reached over and pulled it out. Now I know she doesn't like this, so I pushed it back in!" 

o-o-O-o-o

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class. 

One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?" 

When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. 

"GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep. 

A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Savior," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. 

Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. "JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep. 

Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" 

And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!" 

The Teacher fainted. 

o-o-O-o-o

Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. 

Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. 

One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel's bigger?" 

Johnny grins and says, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd stop doing it, and so far I've made $20!" 

Monday, May 10, 2021

Westside Saints is available now in paperback.

 

Return to a twisted version of Jazz Age New York in the follow up to Westside 

 

"A masterpiece."—Library Journal

 

Six months ago, the ruined Westside of Manhattan erupted into civil war, and private detective Gilda Carr nearly died to save her city. In 1922, winter has hit hard, and the desolate Lower West is frozen solid. Like the other lost souls who wander these overgrown streets, Gilda is weary, cold, and desperate for hope. She finds a mystery instead.

 

Hired by a family of eccentric street preachers to recover a lost saint’s finger, Gilda is tempted by their promise of “electric resurrection,” when the Westside’s countless dead will return to life. To a detective this cynical, faith is a weakness, and she is fighting the urge to believe in miracles when her long dead mother, Mary Fall, walks through the parlor door.

 

Westside Saints is available now in paperback from Amazon and other booksellers.  

 

Sunday, May 9, 2021

Little Johnny 4

Fred and Mary got married, but can't afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred's parent's home for their first night together. 

In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast.

 As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. 

She replies, "No". Johnny asks, "Do you know what I think?" His mom replies, "I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to school." 

Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" 

She replies, "No." Johnny says, "Do you know what I think?" 

His mom replies, "Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school." 

After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" 

His mom says "No." He asks, "Do you know what I think?" 

His Mom replies, "Ok, do tell me what you think?" 

He says: "Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue." 

o-o-O-o-o

A teacher said to her class, "All Right, I’m going to hold something under the desk and I want you to guess it. This one is round and red." 

Little Johnny's hand shot up, but he was ignored. 

"It's a plum miss," said a girl.

"No it's an apple, but I like your thinking. The next one is oval shaped and green."

The teacher ignored Little Johnny again and a boy said, "It's a kiwi miss." No, it's a guana, but I like your thinking." 

Little Johnny said, "I got one miss, its stiff, about an inch long and with a red nib." 

"Johnny, that’s disgusting!" shouted the teacher. 

"No it's a match, but I like your thinking." said Little Johnny. 

o-o-O-o-o

One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. 

Little Johnny asked, "Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?" 

His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your anus?" 

"No", said Little Johnny.

His grandpa replied, "Then you're not old enough." 

The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. 

He asked, "Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?" 

His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your anus?" 

"No" said Little Johnny. 

"Then you're not old enough." his grandpa replied. 

The next day, Little Johnny was eating cookies. 

His grandpa asked, "Can I have some of your cookies?" 

Little Johnny replied, "Can your penis reach your anus?" 

His grandpa replied, "It most certainly can!" 

Little Johnny replied, "Then go screw yourself "

Saturday, May 8, 2021

 

A new motley crew journeys to another corner of the cosmos in the final installment of the Wayfarers series

With no water, no air, and no native life, the planet Gora is unremarkable. The only thing it has going for it is a chance proximity to more popular worlds, making it a decent stopover for ships traveling between the wormholes that keep the Galactic Commons connected. If deep space is a highway, Gora is just your average truck stop.

 

When a freak technological failure halts all traffic to and from Gora, three strangers—all different species with different aims—are thrown together at the Five-Hop. Grounded, with nothing to do but wait, the trio—an exiled artist with an appointment to keep, a cargo runner at a personal crossroads, and a mysterious individual doing her best to help those on the fringes—are compelled to confront where they’ve been, where they might go, and what they are, or could be, to each other.

 

Available now from Amazon and other booksellers